A conflicted 2-year annivarsery, and please let me say hello!

I have to say I find it annoying. And quite frustrating.

Home is Away Away is Home; Two Stories Worth Being Told is celebrating its 2-year anniversary this weekend! Two years and 96 postings! Trouble 1’s lovely Space Needle and Kolbäcksbro illustrations imaging my two cities. Most every week I have been writing my stories and according to the Blogger statistics there are some people out there reading them. I don’t know them. I don’t know you. But I am so curious about you!

My very first posting was entering cyberspace in the Seattle Montlake neighborhood in the lovely apartment I was renting from the equally lovely Dita, only one block up from where me and my family was living 1996-97. The 1-year anniversary posting was written on the Iceland Air flight taking me from the lower Queen Anne penthouse Seattle view back to Sweden. And my 2-year posting is happening on my couch here at the end of the road in my little village next to Umeå. My back turned acute again yesterday, and I am humbled by life.

The purpose for my blog was to share stories from my two hometowns Umeå and Seattle. Stories about two very different cities with a lot of things in common. The northern locations in their countries, the cultural arts scene, the Waterfront design, the building cranes, the tolerance and open minded Seattleites and Umebor, the moving forward spirits.

And I have. I have been telling about the Waterfront projects in both cities. About the Seattle process and the Umeå process (democracy is strong and we take our time). The traffic situations, architecture, the bicyclists, Refused and Nirvana, developers and preservers, spectacular out door venues and Swedish politics verses American. To name a few.

I love that. I love doing a good research and get the story right. I used to be a journalist. A public service broadcast journalist. Therefore, every time I am reporting about a high-rise discussion or a traffic gridlock situation I am feeling like I am doing my job. In two aspects. I am telling about something real and important, hard facts. And I am following my original purpose for Home is Away, Away is Home.

Imagine then my frustration when checking in with the Blogger statistics. Telling me only a few are interested reading about that subject! My extremely important topic from last week, the Neo Nazis marching in, only made an imprint as a little bump on the statistical curve!

The statistics is hard to figure out though. It’s numbers and different numbers, it’s diagrams and curves. And they don’t match. It’s actually impossible to get a grip. So I’ve decided to go with the curve. It’s clear and easy to follow. It speaks for itself. And this is what the curve is telling me:

You guys, out there, like reading about when my personal life is really miserable! That’s when the curve is peaking! And the tallest of the tall miserable peaks is the 2012 late fall one when I couldn’t move what so ever because of a giant knife in my back, I had to accept an alarm on my wrist, foreign people in my house 24-7 and a life a dozen times more restricted and lonely than my 96-year old neighbor Alida! That’s what you like folks!

Don’t get me wrong. Really. It is moving and it is touching. And it actually brings me a great deal of comfort in difficult times. I am truly very grateful. But hey, my journalist soul is revolting!

When I started Home is Away, Away is Home, I wasn’t planning on being personal at all, except for stories connected to the original purpose of the blog. But as time passed, life provided me material with great impact on myself, and therefore close to my heart and easily transferred to my fingers tapping the computer keyboard.

Telling stories about Seattle and Umeå is catching floating material from outside in a cone connected to my Mac Book, transforming to an informative, interesting and at times even entertaining piece hopefully providing aha knowledge and insights in foreign matters.

Telling my personal stories is quite the opposite. It’s looking into my heart and soul for a feeling, fish it up, transfer to my head and give it letters, syllables, words, images and colors. And the Blogger curve tells me, that’s when my audience is caught by the story.

Am I surprised? Not really. This is what I am teaching when I am preaching storytelling professionally. Fill your story with people, emotions, images, and stay true. That’s how you can reach someone’s heart.

So why am I annoyed? Why frustrated? Well, I could come up with something heartwarming or heartbreaking to tell most every week. But I just find it too…easy. A facile point win (does that work in this context?). And I don’t want Home is Away, Away is Home to be an all mushy porridge of emotions and sentiments.

I must admit it’s a conflict though. I am embarrassed to tell those really high peaks on the statistics curve makes my heart race. Why embarrassed? Because I am a public service journalist at heart, goddamn it! I am trained not going for the big crowd by cheap tricks!

So. Therefore I am still determined to stay focused on parallel city planning and Swedish-American analyzes. But I have also learned to love sharing my personal stories, safe that they will be received and embraced by you. And although my perspective nowadays is somewhat restricted by my physics, my life is yet remarkably eventful. So, I am convinced that there will be many stories still to tell and to wait for.

Now, the Blogger statistics also tells where my readers are located! Sweden, US, Russia, China, Brazil, UK, France, Japan a s o. This I have very hard to believe! Sweden and the US, yes, but I can’t figure out why someone in Russia or UK would be interested in my Umeå-Seattle stories. My guess would be some blog scan computer program checking in giving false information.

I am really curious though! It’s a very special feeling following that magic curve, knowing that you are out there but not who and where you are. I am so grateful for your presence and feel safe to ask you for an anniversary present: could you please come out from that anonymous statistical curve, transform to people in flesh and blood and let me say hello to you? That would totally make my Two Year Day and inspire me to continue sharing my Home is Away, Away is Home stories with you. Thank you for being there! And I am planning on the 3-year anniversary in Seattle…